The continuing story

Though Annette was becoming very active in our church during these years, I was always working. This was a time when I was truly adrift. One of these years I'd officially labeled, "the year in hell." At one point after having opened a new restaurant and working 100 hours a week, I was close to a nervous breakdown. One night I simply walked away from the restaurant, got in the car and started driving. As I approached the interstate, home was to my left and I turned right. I drove for a long time. Eventually, I turned around and headed towards home. But as I entered the neighborhood, instead of going home, I stopped at the Pastor's house which was around the corner. He was home and gave me some of his time. We just talked. He parted with some heavy philosophy like, "it just a job." But, more importantly, he shared that he'd felt like this before too. And, he wondered if I might be willing to "talk to somebody." You know the euphemism. Turns out that he'd been in therapy for years. So I started going. I was with that same counselor for 10 years. He's what's known as a Pastoral Counselor. They're ministers and psychotherapist. Over the years we talked about just about everything. So, time passed. I was starting to read books by Christians about Christianity. Then the turning point was after we had a new Pastor come (this is about 1995) he started some regular Bible studies that I could fit into my schedule. I think my first big one was on a Wednesday night. It didn't take long after that. I really felt that I was reading source material there. I wasn't reading about anything, I was reading it; the thing itself. There were many hurdles to overcome. The first was the deity of Jesus. If Jesus isn't God then none of it works. This was more of a philosophical question for me though. I really didn't have too much trouble with it. Mostly just to get the theology in my head. The next big thing was (is) obedience. This ties in with the nature of sin. More on that later. Obedience implies trust. So a time went by when I was growing in my trust. There were numerous examples of my trust being built up over time. Eventually, I had complete trust and felt very sure that I "should" obey. (Don't we all!) The last big thing was the seeming contradictions between faith and science, specifically with origins, creation and evolution. It would be one thing if I didn't really have much interest in these things, but I knew that God had given me a passion for it and therefore a reason likely existed. One day while walking to my car after work I simply prayed, "God, tell me the answer. What's the story with evolution, Darwin, you know, the whole thing." And, he answered me. He said, "I love you and I will always be there for you. Everything you need, you will have." That was it. I've not doubted his love or my faith since then. I continue to read science especially Biological Evolution. Every summer I facilitate discussion with a group a teenagers about faith and science at a thing called Science Camp. It's a Methodist Church Camp. Can you believe that. Science Camp. Who thinks of these things?! I'm in the middle of a conversation now with a husband and wife and church. He's a Holy-Roller-fundamentalist-new-believer and she's a liberal Catholic who's wondering what fell on his head. Their arguing over guess what? Evolution. I told them I could help them. I'm blessed to be able to do this. They both think I'm on their side. And I am of course. Wow, this is turning into the book right here. Why'd you get me started?! Ask me about something else, like "What do you think of the Beatles?"