A day I'll always remember

As Jennifer recounted her story from this terrible day in 1998, I couldn't help but to add my reflections too. It was indeed a Sunday, and like most Sundays in those days, I worked the popular Brunch at the 9th Street Abbey in Soulard. I got home about 4 pm I guess, and Annette said, "Rich, I've got some bad news for you." I couldn't tell you how I knew, but from the inflection in her voice I knew that something terrible had happened. My subconcience blinked immedietly to the new baby of the family, Ryder Green. My other sister Becky and I had just been to Sacramento to visit them. But a second later the truth was announced: Don Coil was dead; a tragic mountain accident. The husband of my little sister, who so dearly loved to climb mountains had falled off of one. Disbelief doesn't quite describe the feeling. My overall feeling of that day was helplessness. When the phone finally rang with Jennifer on the other end, I simply didn't know what to say or do. To this day I can't believe I didn't get on a plane and head out there. I hate myself for that. All I could think about was a huge catering event that I was in charge of the next weekend and I was due to head to the site on Wednesday. I told Jennifer this and of course she said, "That's OK." I was still talking to her on the phone when Annette and Emily had to leave to go somewhere. A minute later I hung up and burst out crying. Crying for my sister. I prayed, "Please God, help her; stay with her." Suddenly, Annette came back upstairs for something she'd forgotten. I stopped crying. Why? Guys do that. My memory of Jennifer is how incredibly strong she seemed to be. I guess part of it was that she had to be for her kids, but she survived a trauma that most of us can't imagine. We see it in the movies or on TV but reality isn't like that. Reality is real.

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